1.) Obviously, I live in the Midwest. Kansas City, to be exact. The one in Missouri. Which is the real, big deal one. I was born, raised and educated in the Midwest, and I think it’s one of the best places on God’s green earth. Of course its culture has its eccentricities, but that suits me, and they make for great blog fodder.
2.) I’m the mom of a toddler, but this will not be a mommy blog. Of course, there will be some stuff about parenthood because it’s a pretty big part of my life, and it’s a pretty regular source of hilarity and amazement. But not all mom, all the time. It’d be nice if childless people and boys read this, too. Oh, and I’m also a wife to a great guy who is my perfect complement.
3.) I think the following things are funny: poop, America’s Funniest Home Videos, books by Laurie Notaro and irony (not the kind Alanis Morissette sings about, which someone who I can't remember once summed up perfectly: "That's not ironic, that's a series of bummers.")
4.) I can’t burp. Well, it happens like once every 5 or 6 years. Many people have expressed great concern about this. Don’t worry. I’m fine. Just don’t expect me to drink a carbonated beverage because I might blow up.
5.) I love, love, love books. I’ll feature some reviews on here, especially for bad books. Kind of like our local alt-weekly used to do.
6.) More specifically, I’m kind of an anglophile. I’m the stereotypical Jane Austen nerd. I’ve even been to her house in England. I was excited, but I did not faint as the tour guide informed me some people do. I love me some period pieces and British accents, though. When will breeches come back?
7.) By day, I do public relations for a big law enforcement agency. I can’t talk about much of it, but it’s exciting and interesting and lets me see a lot more of society’s seedy underbelly than most people get to. I’ve also learned a lot about drugs. Did you know PCP makes people get hot and naked? I didn’t either when I first took the job many years ago, but now I’m a veritable encyclopedia of illegal narcotics.
8.) I’m a Christian. Not the “Jesus is a Republican,” protesting, bumper sticker-sporting kind. Just the kind who wants to live out God’s top two commandments - love God and love others - but frequently fails. Also the kind that cusses a few times a day, fights judgmental tendencies and frequently has to step out of church services because my kid can’t keep it together in the nursery.
9.) I have two cats, Bennett and Sabrina. They are constantly desirous of more food, especially snuggly in winter and tear through the house at inappropriate times.
10.) Bad grammar and spelling drives me up the wall. So does passive voice. That said, don’t crucify me if I have a typo on here.
11.) Weird things happen to me: wrong-number text messages with pictures of an unknown penis, diseases no one has heard of (I had herpangina once - look it up), stupendously awkward situations and conversations. Now, I can share all this with the world!
12.) I’ve struggled with depression, anxiety and OCD. Not the kind of OCD everybody annoyingly claims to have because they’re hyper-organized. It’s the real deal that I need medication for. Mental illness is so misunderstood and stigmatized, and if I can change that a little bit, I feel like I’ve accomplished something.
13.) I have poor hand-eye coordination and thus suck at any sports with balls. Don’t ask me to be on your team. I also hate running. I care about being in shape, though. Fortunately, I’m a decent dancer, and Zumba and I are doing pretty well together
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